RILEY FUCKING NASH

Apologies to Asiaoil, who I foolishly took offense to after seeing my thoughts on this worthless prospect seemingly turned into a personal attack on myself.

Asiaoil usually makes great comments, and if I wasn't so fucking tired right now I might haven't have responded in the petulant manner which I did.

Still, Riley Nash strikes me as an idiot of the first degree. Woo Hoo, going to an Ivy League college, to reprise Ryan O'Neil's role from Love Story, or whatever the fuck else he's there for.

He's a first round NHL draft pick for fuck sakes. Fuck school when you're a miserable BC hockey league star, miraculously drafted so highly. You call that good business, turning down the shot at playing professional hockey, after getting chosen in the first round draft of the greatest pro league in the world?

Not me. I call that bad business. There are times to bide your time, and times to jump into a pool of sharks. Times to play safe, and times to go for broke. Seems to me like Riley wants to go to his college, party and fuck co-eds, then sashay over to the pro ranks, and somehow, despite the fact he's not even developing properly anymore, show his first round credentials and waltz into the Oilers lineup. Sorry shmuck, that's not how it works.

It's a marathon, winning the game of life, and a marathon making a pro sports career. I was talking on Lowetide's blog the other day about how young players foolishly stop developing their weaknesses, right at the last post, when they're in major junior hockey, not understanding that they're still so many fish compared to the 1,500 active professional players at any given moment.

Just because you're drafted highly, doesn't mean fuck all, not unless you develop and develop and develop until the head coach of your pro team simply cannot afford to ignore you at training camp.

What's Nash done? He's fucking regressed, that's what. Okay, enjoy your education, and forget the pros. You're not going to make it sucker. That kid riding the Saskatchewan bus wants it more than you do, is working harder, is probably younger, and by the time you're facing off against him in training camp, will have forgotten more about what it takes to succeed as a hockey player than you're likely to ever know.

Rant over.

what the fuck

Oilers are too good for a lottery pick, not good enough for a playoff winning run.

Business as always.

The good:

Penner
Smid
Brule
Visnovsky

The bad:

Moreau
Pisani
Khabibulin
Kevin Lowe

The ugly:

Oilers chance of winning the cup in the next decade

Spot the Difference

I have to admit, the 27th place Oilers(It's November 30th) make me laugh more than they make me cry. Who put this bunch of clowns together, with most of the top six too small to do anything but slink around the perimeter of the ice, all the while hoping none of the glass defencemen(I love the defence when healthy btw) doesn't get carted off ice?

I just want them to end up in 30th place, win the lottery, and pick the best player available. Let's face it. it's our only hope at this point.

Hockey's a game about talent.

And the Oilers haven't got much.

Check out other teams in yhe NHL. The great players always rise in hockey. Bums go round and round, but the cream always rises.

Except in Edmonton Oilerland. We have "prospects" who are always drafted low in the first round or lower, who we hope will turn out to be "steals", but never fucking turn out to be anything much at all.

Stamkos in Tampa. Crosby in Pittburgh. Parise in New Jersey.

Oilers have Souray, who's horribly injury prone. Ditto Khabibulin. Ditto Visnovsky.

OIlers have pluggers who aren't really worth very much unless you're Kevin Lowe. Then you end up with Horcoff, Staios, Nilsson, Moreau all for the bargain basement price of around 12. million a season.

Then there are the wonderful kids. But none of them are doing very much.

No real defensive stud either.

This is a mediocre joke of a franchise. The Cleveland Indians of the NHL.

Sad sick and entirely fucking true.

A Question:

Given the reality of a seemingly endless procession of mediocre/bad seasons:

Is there hope for the Edmonton Oilers?

Incredibly shit contracts for pedantic, unoffensive players who can't score in a brothel.

A bunch of dwarves, in a game almost entirely dictated by size.

Nothing special coming down the pipe, unless you're smoking one.

Anything else?

Oh yeah, a General Manager who clearly doesn;t know how to do his job, a "President of Hockey Operations" who should be a New York Rangers scout, and a corporate mindset more geared to blackmailing the community than improving itself as an on ice product.

Ancestors who were killed in the wars. One of them, an 18 year old from Ontario, blown to pieces after being in France for 4 weeks. They never found so much as a shred of him - I've got a pic of him somewhere, he looks just like a tin soldier.

But even though everyone else in the internet are sanctimoniously making announcements, today i want to examine a thought: Every asshole these days loves to yap about how old time hockey players wouldn't stand a chance in today's uber NHL, so I want to pose the question: WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO A 2009 PANSY ASSED NHLER, TWILIGHT ZONED INTO 1959?

No special diets laid out by specialist staff no...just steak and chips...three times a day I'd imagine. When he complains, the other players just look at him and laugh, like he's nuts or something.

Then postgame, no special fluids to rebuilt his chemicals, just beer beer and more beer.

He wants to train, like in 2009 - but once again the player's culture mocks him. They stay fit by playing in the games - so what's this idiot's problem?

His equipment is ahem, primitive? Who wouldn't love to see their most hated goalie twilight zoned to 1959, NO MASK??? No special fatboy lightweight goalie equipment either - just leather stuffed with horsehair crappola.

Skates and sticks, wood and leather only please. Soggy equipment. No helmets to protect sissy heads.

Play a few bad games during the adjustment? No problem! The 2009 dude simply gets cut and ends up in the AHL - forever.

Ditto if precious gets injured.

Gordie Howe runs him into the boards head first? Depends. If at home, the crowd boos a little. If away, it cheers. The refs do nothing.

After the season, time to get a job. Like when my dad saw Gordie fucking Howe in April, sitting in a santa style grotto in the 60's, at the Bay. Yikes. And he was lucky not to have to go get a real job.

But, provided precious can hack the reality of the man's game, I would think after a few months, he would start to realise that he was actually in a cool situation. A part of a real team, not just a collection of overpaid fuckwits. being able to shag pretty girls left right and center, without any fear of consequences.

Thought: How many games would Mike Modano's teeth have lasted in 1959?

I'm starting to get bored by the Oilers

Once upon a time, when I was a youngster, the Oilers ruled the universe of hockey.

Then, while still a youngster, I got to see my team turned over like a Times Square hooker.

Then, for the next decade or so(longer but I'm getting bored with even counting the years), the OIlers were a mediocre franchise, team, everything. The model of a pathetic, small market franchise.

Last year they finally fire dodo MacTavish, and bring in Quinn etc. Great. Good times ahead.

But no one bothered to tell the general manager that the players stink. No one has bothered to tell the general manager that his job is to manage the fucking team. But since he obviously doesn't the Oilers today are essentially in the same position player and contract wise as they were before he was hired.

Please.

I'm simply starting not to care. Seriously. Last night against the Avalanche, all I could think was how small the Oiler forwards were. You know, just like the last time Dallas pasted them in the playoffs. Come to think of it, 2006 aside, that was the last time this craptastic franchise has even been in the fucking playoffs.

Response to inevitable "let's thank" MacT nonsense

"Can we take a moment to tip the hat in the direction of Craig MacTavish" - Actually, no. This unqualified tool was handed the hopes and dreams of a sports community for eight seasons, and never iced anything but a mediocre team.

"He coddled some" - Yeah, the third rate vets who he treated like a gay shopteacher grooms the geeky kids.

"Yelled at others" - Yeah, by going to the fawning local media and in the process showed anyone who's anyone just what a tool he really was.

"And went too far with Dustin Penner" - Not quite. Penner simply refused to listen to this twit. How strange, how Penner blossoms the moment MacT is gone?

"I think it's impossible to view this team moving forward without acknowledging the previous coach" - While we're on the topic, let's all thank that eleven year old who farted at the right time in Okinawa.

"He did teach the Gagner's and the Cogliano's" - To regress.

"What future success this team enjoys is at least a little about the lessons learned from a very smart man" - WTF is everyone going on about MacT being smart? Because he wears glasses? The dude comes off to me like some kind of narky self serving dickhead. But that's just me, and three quarters of the Edmonton Oilers team.

What's wrong with the Oilers? Nothing?

Hey as you all know, I am one of the most unforgiving of Oiler fans. I have zero sympathy for Ryan Smyth, or any other past player who whined their way out of town for that matter. At least in the medium term. Who knows? One day I might actually say I liked watching the Smyth Weight Guerin Oilers.

Not.

This was an era where the Oilers simply had zero chance of winning the cup. Zero! Sorry, but with zero hope, there's zero giving a fuck coming from me.

Now, after 8 fucking years of that jailbird Gay drunken convict MacTavish finally we all get to actually ENJOY watching the team play. Why? No fear of making a mistake, getting thrown out onto the ice with a minute left, because the coach TRUSTS you, that kind of astonishing leadership stuff that great men use when dealing with their charges.

Having just returned from a week in Amsterdam(and yes, it's everything you ever dreamed of as a kid), well...I don't really know what's going on with the Oilers, but I sure the f**k got to encounter a lot of sensational females.

PS: to last post

I can't help being an Oilers fan, but now they're going great we're all happy.

I can't help relaying the news that Craig MacTavish is still without employment in the NHL coaching ranks.

Oilers 5-2-1

Sensational to return from a week away to this, the Oilers beat the stupid nyuck yuks and are right up there in the top ten of the league.

This was where I went.

OIlers 2-1-1

I'm sorry to all of my "fans", but I'm going to be away for the next 3 games in Europe on a well deserved holiday.

How will the Oilers do without me, lol.

All I know is, they're playing pretty good hockey, they're on pace for the 100 points, and they've played all their games at home.

See y'all in 7 days time.

The 1-1-1 Oilers!

This is an ancient NY Rangers Cup winning team, from 1933. I'm told one of my ancestors tried out for them, back in the day, which gives me somewhat of a soft spot for the rags.


Oilers have now played 3 games, and are 1-2 in them. Sorry, I don't count losses. Okay, maybe 1-1-1 if you insist on the old time system. No problem.

So, how are they doing? They've played 2 games vs more or less elite opposition, and 1 game against a lousy team. Surprise surprise. The Stars are now a third rate team, the Flames first, and the Oilers? They're second rate.

Last year, gay shopteacher MacT had them playing like a fourth rate team. So now, they've made the big jump, from fourth to second. Not too shabby.

Personally I expect Quinn to be talking to Katz sooner or later, and telling him just what a crock of crap some of the current lineup really are. I seriously doubt if he talks to Tambellini, who seems more and more like a glorified office clerk.

Then what? No idea. After all, I'm not running the Oilers.

Prediction: Oilers finish 6th in the West

Call me crazy, but there we are.

Why 6th, and not 14th?

For one thing, they have a coach who knows his freaking business, after the gay shopteacher's wacko experiments which left so many young players psychologically assraped.

For another thing, the team has better players than we think, and finally...

I always pick these twats for 6th, then suffer the rest of the year as they struggle to make 8th, or 10th.

What's the Use in Even Caring Anymore?

I've been an official Oilers fan ever since 1983. That's quite a lot longer than most of the current fans, some of whom were not even alive back then.

But, why even bother? The team as constituted as of Sept 30, 2009, is absolutely pathetic.

It might as well be 2000, for all of the hope they offer the fans.

Personally i don't give a monkey's about Fernando Pisani, Ethan Moreau, Shawn Horcoff, or honestly any of those millionaire prats.

I was a huge Rob Schremp supporter, that is, until yesterday when, after spending a few days off the computer screen I returned only to see he's been waved/is an Islander.

Right now I'd love to be an Isles fan. Top drafted player in Tavares, Schremp, and the future to look forward to.

What exactly do the Oilers have to look forward to? Fighting for 8th? Seeing if any of their mediocre crop of young players will develop enough to be able to hold the team to ransom in 2-3 years? Or wondering what will happen when old man Quinn drops dead behind the bench?

Sorry, but until Katz ices a team that's either favoured to win the cup or in the finals, I might as well be distancing myself from this abortion of a hockey franchise.

Fan Sentimentality in Professional Sports 2009

I can understand the angst of the Hawks fans, when the odd guy out in this quartet was going through the incredibly sad and rapid decline of his physical abilities to play the game of hockey.

What I don't understand, is why Oilers fans, pussy whipped for the past 18+ seasons, cling to the hope that any of the others represent anything but the continuing mediocrity of the franchise.

Now, when I was seeking these pics, Pisani almost broke my heart, and mine is as black as they get. A truly nice human being, he is. Staios seems like a decent dude too, and I would want Moreau sitting at my table in the Kingsway bar when things get rowdy. But on my hockey team? Thanks guys, but no thanks.

Why? because, for various reasons all four of the pictured players were/are fairly USELESS to the reality of their respective hockey clubs.

Unlike many Oilers bloggers, I don't substitute hockey for religion. For me, it's a diversion from my stressful existence, a way to pass time when I've got nothing else to do but chase my girlfriend, drink and/or generally be a wastrel. In short, it helps keep me out of trouble.

Get it? it's something I do, for MY reasons.

These players make a lot more money than I do. In a society based upon greed, they're all coming out way ahead of me right now. So please, don't think for a SECOND I sit up night worrying about any of them. Any more than I worry about the status of women in Afghanistan.

Nice team Lowe!

Oilers roared off to a giddy 3-0 start, now are returning back to where they should be as the sink back to 3-2 and tonight the vaunted Flames will be fired up to drop Quinn another notch down the expectation scale.

I wonder what Quinn's thinking, now that he's actually working with these stiffs.

Veterans who have little to no veteran savvy, youngsters who have little talent, sluggers who can't fight.

Let's make a list of hackers and non hackers!

The good: Souray, Visnovsky, Khabibulin, Hemsky, THAT'S ALL FOLKS!

The mediocre: Grebeshkov, Gilbert, Smid, Horcoff, Penner, DesLauriers, Cogliano, Comrie, O'Sullivan, Stortini, Gagner, MacIntyre

The bad: Staios, Moreau, Pisani, Strudwick, Pouliot, Jacques, Nilsson

Still in camp, barely: Dubnyk, Peckham(IR), Chorney, Brule, Schremp, Reddox, Brennan, Eberle, Stone

I realise there are serious faults in my list. Some of the above players might shock and move up the list, but right now, it's only September, and the team already looks set to flounder.

So, let's make up a hunter1909 players who I want to get rid of list from the above: Comrie, Staios, Moreau, Pisani, Strudwick, Pouliot, Nilsson, Chorney, Reddox, Eberle(back to juniors for fuck sake do this kid a favour!).

Comrie is playing okay, that's just a sentimental decision, lol.

Oilers under Quinn make 6th in the West, easy

Normally I hate to make predictions, but the Oilers in their first 3 pre season games look like a bona fide playoff team to me.

I'd be tempted to say higher than 6th, but I'm not that big a fool.

: p

This is what I'm talking about

Here's the dark and yes, satanic side to the Oilers. Pat Laforge, who's been squawking to the press recently about how the FILTHY RICH DRUG DEALER OWNER doesn't want to keep pouring money down the black hole that's the Edmonton Oilers.

Anyway, this is exactly what Pocklington started all those years ago, then dutifully carried on(I mean whining to the press, with the veiled threat of taking the Oilers out of Edmonton), and even tacitly kept going by the good old EIG.

Here's what hunter1909 would do if he was the say, mayor of Edmonton: I'd simply tell the Oilers: "Okay. Get the fuck out, as soon as the Northlands lease runs out. because, we're going to be trying to get one of the southern NHL teams up here, once they've realised that they're all losing money faster than a crack house on Baffin island".

Then what will Laforge, Lowe, and Katz do? Where exactly are they planning to move the Oilers to, anyway? Las Vegas? With the worst fucking economy in America, I rather doubt it. Portland? Um, has anyone who reads this blog actually ever been to Portland should be able to see that it's a single economy city(lumber), with fuck all hockey tradition(like Seattle), etc.

I'd love to see the Oilers move. I'd far prefer to have the Predators, Panthers, Hurricanes, Coyotes here, than these second rate gangsters.

reasons to be cheerful about the Oilers on Septamber 15, 2009

Okay why is Pat Quinn a great coach for these Oilers?

1- He's not the gay shopteacher. This translates to: he's not playing favourites, no one goes into a psychic doghouse from hell, he has a fucking clue what he wants and most of the players are prepared to skate through brick walls for him.

2 - He knows when to delegate, and when to open his big fat irish gob. I'm irish, and, believe it or not, I work in an upper management position. Sometimes. When I'm in the chair, I usually try to do as little as possible. Why? it's not my job to do anything, it's my job to make sure everyone else is doing their job properly. If and only if there is a problem, normally will I so much as speak. In short, Pat's as lazy as I am. And lazy people so long as they have talent get along well in this life.

note; The jury's still out as to whether or not I've got talent for my profession, but wtf, I'm still doing it so maybe one day everyone will either agree that I'm talented, or alse I'll be out of work long enough to fiugure it out that I'm really a putz.

3 - He's too old to give a fuck about the future, therefore he's immune to the pathetic politicking coming from upstairs. Pat will soon be dead. He's not a young man, lol. So, he's basically going to do things his way, and fuck anyone who disagrees. It might either get him fired or else he's going to die behind the bench(I figure that's a cool way to die myself), but either way, he's not going to be like tambellini, a man who increasingly looks like a puppet for the dark forces running the Oilers.

4 - Mike Comrie has to go. Too small, too slow, too everything that's bad for the team. On the other hand, should Schremp make the team, I might even return to following them.

5 - It's been raining cat's and dogs most of today. Everyone looks crazy, after a month of beautiful weather. No one will remember the good weather in say, three to four more days if this keeps up(and golly it probably will keep up).

Just as I decide I hate the Oilers, I get tossed a lifeline

Pat Quinn is a great coach right now. He's taken over a team that have had their collective asses raped over the past several years by that gay shopteacher MacTavish, and look to be totally responsive to Quinn's wit and Irish wisdom.

Being Irish myself(a dissolute great grandfather, then teetotal grandmother...you know the drill lol), lets me appreciate the effect of the gruff and charming coach, unlike non micks.

Looks like(September 15 today) that Schremp and Nillsson and Penner are all going to break out of their collective shells, under a real coach.

MacTavish was a fool. I think he's the fool Quinn was referrring to when he stated that only stupid people repeat the same mistakes. MacT wanted everything his own way, just like that gay shopteacher who lords it over the 20 odd junior high school boys, for one morning a week.

Quinn on the other hand brings a breath of fresh air to what can only be described as a moribund franchise.

Comrie I'm extremely glad to hear, sucks at camp so far. Maybe he gets cut, lol. I sure the fuck hope so. Talk about a fitting exit to that little creeps career. Then he can go work for his dad, flogging dodgy sticks of furniture or whatever.

I do like hearing about his girlfriend Hilary Duff handing out food to bums, sounds like a decent little chick.

I'm through with the Oilers - finally

What are my reasons? How about since the Mark Messier trade?

I was brought up to assume my team could skate, score, and control it's destiny. Then, piece by piece, my childish ideas were replaced, well before they should have been, with the cynicism of professional incompetance in sports.

For years I was fed the bullshit that the Oilers were hopefully about to turn the corner.

It's all bullshit.

The Calgary Flames have a pretty good hockey team, to go with their up and coming city. Edmonton hasn't.

Oh well. Now I will be able to concentrate on other things, like whatever I should have been doing instead of wasting my time fretting over a rotten to the core...ROTTEN TO THE CORE hockey club.

Oh yeah. The pic. Stalingrad kids, taken in the 1950's after they found a few things lying around to play with. LOL.

Which proves you're actually better off living in a society where you're left to your own devices, rather than the soft little wusses addicted to RockBand.

Now that Oilers are coachless...

I am finally purged of all former anti-MacT sentiment.

It's over. I wish him well, in all that he does for the rest of his life. 

I've even heard a few Flyers fans talking about him coming to coach them next season.  That would be cool.

Now Tambellini: Dump the following players: Nilsson, Moreau, Staios, Pisani(ok keep him as a token of the 2006 run)...

Then try to get Bouwmeester before the Flames or Nucks  get him...

Don't I repeat DO NOT HIRE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING COACHES: Tom Renney, Marc Crawford

Oh yeah. Fire Chad Moreau, and Kevin Lowe's brother. Make a statement to the organisation, that you're finally going to shake up this throughly rotten team, once and for good.

Hmm...this needs a token pic so

Tambellini Is Scarier Than Anything We Imagined

The Stiff is GONE!!!!!

Will we ever live to see anything like this again? probably not. 

Perhaps in 2088 Oilers return the cup to what I've always perceived as it's rightful home. 

Meanwhile, what have we got? A coachless(THANK FUCK!!!!!) team, with what appears to be the makings of a cool General Manager/Owner.  Kevin Lowe is getting kicked higher and higher, where he won't be able to fuck anything up, and despite the fact this team has almost ZERO top line talent, so what? 

At least I won't ever have to look at that dried out alkie staring from behind the Oilers bench, licking his lips like the thirsty man he no doubt is, all the time appearing like he just dropped a couple of hits of purple microdot.

Fearless Prediction: Next season Oilers will struggle to make the playoffs, then fall short.  The plain truth is, this team hasn't got very much going for it.

Bye Bye MacTavish

Just take a butcher's at this pic. It sums up the MacTavish Oilers better than any words I could compose. 

Just for fun, let's compare it to the iconic Washington crossing the Delaware.

LOL @ Oilers beating the Quacks

I'm pretty certain Oilers finish in 8th. Technically since New Year, I've been imagining 7th, but always felt Oilers are just too fucked up to get that "high".

It also appears there is a civil war going on in the dressing room. On one hand a mediocre 'core' of vets, and a pretty decent but still developing bunch of kids.  Add a coach who for all intents and purposes is a basket case(alcoholism kills MILLIONS  upon MILLIONS of brain cells), and you end up with a paper mache kind of team.

I'm glad they will play the Wings in round 1. Wings will think Oilers are roadkill, after the hammerings they've given them so far, but, in the playoffs, Oilers aren't as shit as the record suggests. 

Eight Long Years of Shit Hockey

I'm currently on a 4-0-0 win streak predicting the Oilers last games. 

It's easy! You just figure out the loser psychology of this sad sack MacT "led" team, and the results come your way.

Now Hemsky wants out, LMAOOOOOO!!

Cue the Oilers  "MY HOCKEY TEAM CRAP OR GOOD" brigade. 

Then Hemsky can go to a real team, and everyone can start hyping Eberle, or whatever teenaged 'sensation' the party line tells us to salivate over. 

Along of course, with the annual 'let's fuck up the future to bring in a washed up old star player', that the old time expansion teams used to play. 

Correct Me If I'm Wrong But...

Here is my analysis re the NHL since last time Oilers won the cup. If there are errors, please feel free to correct me.

This is based on league success and cup winning success since 1991:

Boston - league success     no cups

NJ        - league success           cups 

Wash   - no league success   no cups    BUT WITH OVECHKIN SHOULD WIN CUPS IN FUTURE

Philly   - league success        no cups

Habs    - no league success     cup

Panthers  - no league success  no cups 

NYR     - league success           cup

Pitts     - league success           cups     WITH CROSBY ETC IN LINE FOR MORE SUCCESS

Buff     - league success       no cups

Carolina - no league success   cup

TO        - no league success    no cups

Sens     - league success        no cups

Tampa - no league success     cup

Atlanta - no league success    no cups

NYI      - no league success    no cups

Wings   - league success     cups

SJ          - league success    no cups

Flames  - no league success    no cups

Hawks  -  no league success    no cups

Nucks   - no league success     no cups

CBJ      - no league success     no cups

OILERS - no league success  no cups

Preds     - no league success   no cups

Ducks    - no league success      cup

Stars      - league success          cup

Wild      - no league success   no cups

Blues      - league success        no cups

Kings    - no league success    no cups

Yotes     - no league success   no cups

Avs        - league success           cups

We are now left with 14 teams who have neither had much success in the league, or in cup wins.

Now, subtract the expansion teams since 1991:  Florida, Atlanta, Columbus, Nashville, Minnesota

We are now left with 9 teams: 

From this we subtract the Capitals, because with Ovechkin only an idiot would argue they aren't virtually guaranteed a cup or more.

We now have 8 teams. 

Of these, it's fairly obvious that the Hawks might be about to make a move to the top of the ladder. 

We now have 7 teams: Toronto, NY Islanders in the east; Calgary, Canucks, Oilers, Kings and Yotes. 

I would probably argue that the Flames look pretty decent right now, as does the Kings future-wise. 

We now have 5 teams: Toronto, NY Islanders, Canucks, Oilers, and Yotes = the dregs of the NHL

Nothing to see here

So people come in here to see what the fuss is about, realise that this is nothing more than a front.

I would have liked to have provided a really interesting blog, but the truth be known, I don't have the interest of competance.

I'm just a cynical fan.

Who wishes the Oilers weren't a joke.

ThisTeam is Done

Losing Visnovsky = no cup

I'm a dreamer, but somehow thought a nice back four with Visnovsky, Souray, Gilbert, and Grebshkov could fluke off another nice cup run for the spring.

Where's Yogi Berra when you need him?

It's starting to become clear no one is really running the Edmonton OIlers. 

Oilers aren't just having a civil war between the two normal warring factions.  It's starting to look like fucking Yugoslavia circa 1993 out there, with the coach, veterans, young'uns, and fuck knows who else all taking up their positions. 

Katz MIGHT once have been a fan, but now might as well be another Jim Dolan type - more enamoured at the thought of getting to chum around with the ersatz rock stars he employs, than concerning himself with how that team performs.

Boring Boring Oilers

I'm bored. I used to be a big fan of this team, too.  

But it's too much. 

Maybe I need to jump on the bandwagon of a real hockey team, like the Bruins. I spent my first time in college in Boston, unfortunately I left town before the hockey got going. I did become a Red Sox fan though.

I'd love to be a bandwagon NY Ranger fan. Unfortunately that team doesn't blow as much as those glorious 6 or so seasons prior to the lockout, and it has too many holes to win the cup come next spring. So, fuck that.

There is always les habitats. I'll probably take a wait and see attitude with them, to see if they at least make the semis. First and 2nd round exits aren't my bandwagon style and something tells me the habs are doomed yet again, despite their so-called century of excellence, which has been gone for the past 25 years.

I remember in 1990 thinking that the Oilers were about to do what the Red Wings keep doing....that is, rebuild on the fly. That kid line of Graves, Gelinas and Murphy was awesome every time it hit the ice. With Messier and Kurri, Anderson, and others, the future looked pretty well set.

Congrats Buffalo 10-2

I've checked out of the Oilers game by game self flagellation. The process has become too tiresome for me to want to bother myself with. Whether the Oilers organisation are happy about this news, I'm not yet sure.

Look. They're a young team.

Super puck rushing defence.

Hot and cold goaltending, as this team lives it dies on it's goaltending ever since Fuhr, so no prob there.

I just don't want to give a fuck about this 7th or 8th place team, not until they meet the Sharks/Wings in the opening round of the playoffs.

Think of it like this: Oilers are lulling everyone into thinking they're shit.

Fearless Predictions

Easy Post All Star games Predictions:

Oilers finish 7th or 8th place.

Bring on the Red Wings/Sharks. 

That's all.

My trade bait for big Vinnie

1st round pick

Nilsson

Schremp

Chorney

Nash

No sense in offering the farm but I like any or all of them going the other way for Vincent who wins the Art fucking Ross trophy

LeCavalier to join Oilers lol

Penner   LaCavalier    Hemsky    - oh boy, look out every team in the NHL from this line

Gagner    Doug(Weight)    Cogliano   -  this addresses the need for  a decent 2nd line center to take the draws for the kids

Moreau    Horcoff   Pisani  - this is that 'best third line in hockey' made reality 

MacIntyre  Pouliot   Stortini   - the fourth line, always good for trouble and now MacIntyre scoring LMAO

Souray   Visnovsky   - together they equal a Pronger/Phaneuf level player(sorry Oilers fans i like Phaneuf) 

Gilbert   Grebeshkov - outstanding second pairing defence pairing for offense - I hope Tambelinni figures out a way to sell the farm and leave this lineup intact for the playoffs

Smid    Peckham  - Theo is our secret weapon  

Roloson  

DeLauriers _anyone but Conkannen 

STATE OF OILERS AT ALL STAR BREAK Plus predictions for spring

Please feel free to comment/attack my estimates since I have no idea if any of it holds water :P

OILERS RECORD 24 19 3

LAST YEAR MORE LIKE 3 24 19 LOL

Souray, Visnovsky, are all stars

Gilbert and Grebeshkov top puck moving solid d men

equal to or better than 2006 

wont catch: Sharks, Wings

                     Hawks, Flames

prediction: not this season, too many holes in the team until playoffs

Oilers competition for 5th-8th

Yotes - good

CBJ - good

Nucks - drama

Ducks - drama

Wild - good

Stars - drama/good/fading

Avs - fading

PREDICTION FOR PLAYOFFS(if everything remains the same)Oilers will end up in 7th or 8th

STRENGTHS

best defence

Roloson good/bad

JDD team must use lol 

Eastern Conference playoff predictions estimates:(sketchy at best)

Boston? - choke since 1972 lol, but have to include them

Wash - Ovechkin best team out east 

Habs - very good but pressure might screw them 

NJD - nah

NYR - no toughness

Philly - no defence

Buff - no

Canes - no

Florida - you never know but no

Penguins - hilarious no fucking wingers!

Oilers v Capitals final? Probably no, but Oilers won't go quietly. Wings/Sharks both have been bounced by this team, and must dread a first or second round matchup, which will destroy any chance of a repeat, or first cup.

Oilers for 93 points, 7th or 8th in Conference!

MacTavish shows the method to plodding forward.

I'm totally happy with Roloson, and the Souray defence. 

Tambellini needs to pick up some spare body parts for spring, 2-3 new players are the best, but a lot of the farmhands have played up here in case of injury.

Peca and Sansonov would be ideal, lol circa 2006. I'll leave that to Tambellini.

Oilers to get 93 points and 7th/8th playoff spot

Oilers will make the playoffs. 

The bad news is, they will likely be meeting the Sharks/Red Wings in round 1.

In a way I feel sorry for the other 2 teams. They will have to play a pretty good team, that they're 'supposed' to beat.

Having been railing against the Oilers for most of the season, I have decided to stop. Seriously. With a top 6 defence(ok top 5, sorry Steve) that looks better and better with every game, I'm starting to see what they're trying to do. 

Uber fast defence playing the puck up to the forwards, with a rope a dope depending on the goalie. Oilers hockey.

Okay, I'm sold. 

This is one scary looking pic

So if the Oilers go .600 from here until the end of the season, they will either end up in 7th or 8th place, and meet either the Red Wings or the Sharks. 

Yikes.

The consolation being, Oilers probably aren't the team either wants to meet in round one.

Anderson and Messier look like comic book villians from the upcoming Batman movie.

I don't know if they scare anyone else, but they sure scare the hell out of me.

IF I WERE MADE OILERS COACH TOMORROW

Astonishing as it might seem, I come from four generations of leaders(industry and military); if I were the coach I'd get the team together and with a big smile on my face I'd say something like:

"I don't play favourites. We're going to start winning, as of today. it might not show up on the scoreboard for a few games, but from now on everyone is going to be one the same page, like it or not!

From today we have no captain, and no assistant captains. We're going to hold an election in ten days... a secret ballot...so start thinking today who you want because whoever gets the most votes will be wearing the 'C', and the second and third picks will get the 'A's."

Then I'd either give them the day off, or else bag skate them until every one of them puked their guts out. All shot on multiple cameras, so my assistants could analyse each and every one of them for weaknesses, both physical and mental.

After that I'd buy everyone dinner, and we'd all get blind drunk. Together. 

By the end of the first week I'd know exactly who the non-hackers were, and they'd be eliminated from the team. 

PS: "If any of you don't want to be here, let me know by the end of the week. We will trade you, without any bad feelings or press releases to follow you out of town. I'm sure you're all good players."

PPS: And if I ever heard anyone from the office yapping about the players in any derogatory way, I'd storm into their office and piss on their desk.